dryer, dryer, pant on fire - part I

It is hard to imagine that any given day at office would pass without a minor hitch, not at least when almost all industries are trying to weather the global recession storm (so much to say about a financial company, then). As if work issues aren't enough, sometimes you get hit by other cases which leave you totally disgruntled throughout the day.

I had to reach office early in the morning as I was covering shift for one of my colleague. Having groomed myself thoroughly to start my eventful day, I tend towards opening the door only to find out that it was raining. That was not much of a deal, as I had my jacket which I deemed to be sufficient to defend me from getting drenched. I didn't have a suitable rainproof garment for the lower half of the body so I had myself moving without it anyway. After a while I was on street driving towards office. At first I felt as if it was just drizzling slightly but, as I drove further I saw drizzles turning into shower and by the time I covered nearly half of the distance the mild showers took form of horrid torrential rain. That was my first taste of what they call "The beautiful monsoon" this year as I witnessed water logged roads jammed with long queue of vehicles. Commuters splashed mud and grease in air without caring even a bit on whom it's going to land. I hadn't seen anything like that this season, it was like all monsoon deficit would come to end in a day. On the way while driving in that torrential down pour where things were pitifully visible, I hit the back of the car at my immediate front and broke my bike's indicator. I got the sense that day hadn't somehow started well. Thankfully, any altercation over the incident didn't happen because all everyone was trying to do at that moment was to escape from the rain and I took that opportunity to my full advantage.

By the time I reached office, I was dripping water from all my limbs, nose, hairs, ears, boots. Wherever I stood, I deposited volumes of water on the floor tiles. Gradually, all those gallons of water (inclusive of the mud that my fellow commuters had splashed over me) funneled through my outfit and seeped to my undergarments. I must say, it was the beginning of extremely inconvenient sensation. I entered the wash room to get rid of the excess water flowing from my clothes. I felt I should do something about it before it prevents me from doing my routine business peacefully. The questions was: how to get my cloths dry? I didn't have much options until my sight got locked to the washroom's "hand dryer". Ok, I said, don't give up without a try. So I stood in front (bottom?) of the blower with my back facing towards it...but then, that damn thing would not start unless it senses some object precisely under it, so I projected my hands beneath it and quickly moved them away. Warm breeze of air on the wet pants felt like relief. I did it a few times, but then, I knew, if I were to dry my pant this way, I would have to repeat the steps till eternity [counting the time I would spend on making others in the wash room not to get a sense of what I had been trying to do.] So, I gave up.

After a while, a colleague told me that there is a cloth dryer upstairs in gym's men's changing room. That was the only glimmer of hope I had. I made my ascent upstairs and rushed towards gym in pursuit of the last hope that could save me a bad day. In all restlessness caused by the moist undergarments, I quite dashed the gym's door hard [that too, in opposite direction] and ended up drawing everyone's attention. I giggled and pretended as if nothing happened and rushed towards changing room. There, I found out two fully automatic, front load, washing machines awaiting my service. The one was already in use by housekeeping but the other one looked unoccupied and rather new. What could have been better to make up the bad mood caused by rainfall after getting a new, glossy, first hand, automatic machine, to dry your cloths? I picked a towel from shelf and wrapped it along myself. Then, I removed my jean and shoved it into the machine. After closing machine's door I made some adjustments on the control knobs and left dryer do its magic. I kept on strolling to and fro the room for 4-5 minutes as I saw my jean spinning into the machine. After sometime, I stopped the machine and tried to open the door to take out my pant.....and guess what happened?

...at the beginning, the door of the machine didn't move. I thought, may be, it was jammed because it was new and hadn't been used many times and thus I applied gentle pressure. Nothing happened. In every subsequent attempts I made, the gentle pressure turned more and more into strengthened one, but all to no avail. Faced to that implacable hurdle, I rose to the challenge by enforcing both my hands against the grip but that door wasn't opening. Disgruntled with this unexpected anticlimax of my dream of returning the desk total neat and dry, I decided either I will get the door opened or die trying (which ever comes first) as that had now quite challenged my masculine instincts. I bet, I looked total stupid to other people while I struggled with the door in that wrapped towel and shoes (without socks). I must say, I was in big trouble and totally infuriated.

...now, whoever it was, who said that monsoon is beautiful, fun, welcome season, blah..blah...thankfully wasn't hanging around nearby me that time. I stood helpless, thinking how bad it is going to be further since I had already sealed the fate for the day with new, automatic, frontload, washing machine.

continued in part 2....

Obituary

OBITUARY

"alkara's iPhone, Age - less than a year, unmarried, born somewhere in China, entered into eternal rest, gradually, after being subjected to water and moisture of torrential down pouring that happened on 17-aug-2009 in Hyderabad. He is survived by an earphone, a charger, a docking unit and his dumb careless owner. Throughout his life, he served with great loyality and dealt frustration of his owner in steadfast way. He was abused often for poor reception and was dropper/thrown away in fury. He was disgraced all his life for being used more as an ordinary phone rather than PDA. Though his divine soul has departed, he will continue to be close to his owner by serving the need of a paper weight. Funeral services to be held as soon as owner finds an new working handset."

....

The Optimist's Creed

The Optimist's Creed:

I Promise Myself...

To be so strong that nothing can disturb my peace of mind.
To talk health, hapiness, and prosperity to every person I meet.
To make all my friends feel that there is something worthwhile in them.
To look at the sunny side of everything and make my optimism come true.
To think only of the best, to work only for the best, and to expect only the best.
To be just as enthusiastic about the success of others as I am about my own.
To forget the mistakes of the past and press on to the greater achievements of the future.
To wear a cheerful expression at all times and give a smile to every living creature I meet.
To give so much time to improving myself that I have no time to criticize others.
To be too large for worry, too noble for anger, too strong for fear, and too happy to permit the presence of trouble.
To think well of myself and to proclaim this fact to the world, not in loud words, but in great deeds.
To live in the faith that the whole world is on my side, so long as I am true to the best that is in me.

Christian D. Larson 1912

A song to remember

It was on the last weekend while working in the office, one of my teammates played this song which was from a movie that got released during my college days.....I didn't seem to remember the music....even the starting lines of the song didn't help...he kept compelling me to guess the song and the movie name, but then, I had hardly had any clue...finally he literally had to remind me the name of the movie and what song he was playing......

"Haasil.....the movie name is...do you remember now?"
".....oh yes...I had seen that movie and liked it quite....but never did I know that there was such a beautiful song from that movie?!?!" (leave forgetting things to me....and I am best at it)
"well...I am surprised!?!"

....as I listened that song I kept churning my mind to remember at what sequence in the movie the song was played....I could hardly remember anything....after I was done listening, I couldn't recall in my faintest and distant remembrance that I have ever heard that song......

Later when team was gone.....I somehow could not control myself......the mention of "Haasil" was kind of unsettling to me....it was movie of my college days which I had seen with my friends few times.....within no time I opened youtube with an intent to find the video of the song.....with my eyes wide opened and fingers trembling in egarness, I typed the name of song in search bar and awaited results .....as I looked at the first result it took a fraction of second for me to realize that it was the song that had touched me most in the movie......I don't know how can I be so dumb to forget the song?...the video of this song is very well done......may be the video of the song moved me so much that I might have given very little attention to what was being sung......



I know Haasil was not a show-stealer or extravaganza or "award winning type" movie but I have some good old memories attached to it....as I saw the song that day sitting in front of the monitor, a sensation of nostalgic vibe began to float within my body and brought an avalanche of sweet memories I had had with the movie....it was like all past memories which I had dumped into the dark corner of my heart, took formation of a clear vivid movie and started playing in my mind....by near to the completion of video I was taken back to my old college days......days when I walked miles with my friends without bothering about deadlines and time sheets....days when helping a friend getting through the exams was far more important then scoring good marks.....days when friends screamed from every floor as they saw me entering into the college.....days when canteen was more usual place to find me then in class......days when I was lively and full of fun....that time stands very short when compared to the lifespan but it is still a lot accountable....because that was the time when we all children transformed into men who didn't need parents to judge write or wrong for them, who could stand by and help each other in their thick and thin, who were matured, sensible and grown but still playful like children all the times.....

I took some time to recover from the short nostalgic flashback that had struck me unusually and untimely.....I gathered my senses back and began thinking how far the life has come in this short time.....the whole world that I had sometime desired to cover through steps, now feels so big.....and how I feel so small....a strange phase of life where you are surrounded by crowd...by lots of people with whom you spend half of your day....still you feel alone and shy away to share your real persona.... as I sat alone in my cube with hardly anyone around in the office, I kept remembering those playful times.....at the same time I realized how much I have been ignoring everyone else by not answering the phone calls or not responding on orkut/gtalk......how work has transformed me into a totally unsocial creature.....I took a deep breath and locked my PC and moved away from my desk....by walking through the aisle of walls and cubes, I stepped into the reception area......it was weekend and there was a deep silence around.....I stopped and stood there gazing out of the glass wall....it was quite dark outside and I don't know what I was trying to look at....I don't even know why I went there.....I stood there unmoved hypnotized by the recent retrospection I had had.....somehow I didn't even bat my eyelids as I continued to think of those days......and that's when it happened....I could feel the mist in my eyes....after a long time I felt I was really missing my old days....I didn't know if I wanted to stand there or sit down or go back to desk.....the only thing I knew was I have to keep those times afresh in my memory as long as possible.....may be some day I will get wrinkles all over my face...my hairs will turn grey....i may not be able to run or walk or even stand ......but I would still be writing down the same lines...after watching some similar song....some song, that's worth to remember....

Hulk Alkara

It was not until very late that I was so thin that I had to use belts to keep my trousers felling down to my knees.....there were friends/relatives of mine who kept telling me for years that I haven't changed a bit...I hated to hear that every time....like a pentagonal box, my face had(has?) very sharp edges at chin and front neck which formed the tapered end of the pentagon.....my adam's apple was prominent raising oddly at the top-bottom ends of the neck and steeply meeting towards tip forming a gradient of roughly 45 degrees from neck line....It was so pointed that I could clearly notice it hurting me even on the softest pillow whenever I tend to acquire a freefall sleeping posture....my cheeks were so depressed towards my jaws that it looked like I had got them stitched tightly to the teeth-gums from inside....friends and folks who used to hug me felt nothing except the twing of my collar bones and rib cage....all in all, I was a sort of alive, walking, male human exoskeleton at the best....

before I put more daunting description of my appearence, let me make clear that I have not drastically turned to a macho now (and will never be, probably)....but situation is somewhat better.....I had been maintaining 50Kgs of weight for last 6-7 years ever since I got into college...or precisely....got out of home....once it happened that one of the girls in my college jokingly commented on my lean-thin appearance.....


"Don't you feel you should go to Gym....?"
"No...I don't....and thus, I won't"
"You are very thin...."
"So?...how does that matter?"
"Girls don't like thin guys..."
"Well....at first when I said no...I thought I am being ignorant.....but after you revealed your main idea behind this encouragement....sorry, my answer has turned from no to an EMPHATIC NO!"
"why?"
"well....I would better keep that to myself..."

that conversion shuddered me from inside....not for the reason that I was very thin but for the extent of essence given to muscular physic....the very small, trivial, deep seated urge for "body-building" which I had been neglecting and never allowed to germinate above the surface of my desires had like found a new and more valid/concrete reason for it's eternal deprivation from my attention....

If you ask me....till date...I never seriously thought of entering gym...I am into the category of those few guys today who hardly have desire of true shapes and strength like a hulk....not that I want to downplay the benfits and elegance of muscular build up....but I feel contended with my pencil arms and bamboo feet :-)....with what I have got naturally.....and I don't want to fabricate and adulterate it with extra set of hormones and muscles overgrown at different parts of my body...[ just like Johnny Bravo :-) ].....that too for a reason which I don't consider worth my attention while....plus too....I believe....I don't really have a passion for it....and chances are I will never have.....

I have other important things to mind in my career....and when I put all things together.....the body building and work out in gym seem mundane to my priorities....and I don't have time/energy to focus on that.....

until next time.....

What do you want to be?

Question: How would you let you be somebody among anybody?

:) ok......not to scare you.....this post isn't a primer on "naukri paane ke 101 tareeke"....neither it's a self-help type text....overbearing tiresome philosophy and gyan on employment.....that question was a quotation I saw on the stepney (back) of a scooter one day....and I really don't know what it means......:)

So....this matter had been itching me since long....and I had been yearning to assemble my thoughts together to form a post someday....finally, I thought...It is either today...or never.....

A most common question.....which people ask each other...when they don't have anything else to discuss is...."what do you want to do in life?"....."what is your ambition?"....."where do you see yourself after 10 years?"....and they say these questions reveal about how big you dream, how big is your ambition or how high you think of yourself....and that, it is very important that you have answers to these questions.....but, when people ask me these questions.....The only answer I have is...."I don't know"....because?..... I really don't know.....at first.....they think....I am merely joking....or trying to conceal my plans...where as all I try to do is to be myself and answer the question honestly.....there is no logic and planning behind this answer.....neither does it mean that I don't want to be "somebody" in life.....lately after some compelling attempts from a new set of quizzers (who blamed..."come on man...you don't have ambition?...you don't want to be anybody?")....I gave it a thought as to why I really don't have any answer to these questions....and as far as I understood....to me....it is not much of concern as to what I will be down the road....or what I want to be like......neither I am concerned that I will be running heedlessly in multiple directions unless I set a goal.....the reason behind this uncertainty can have two folds (trust me, I am not sure which one of the two is correct one).....

Either

1. I want to do something big....of which I am not sure, at the moment, as to whether I will be really able to do.....and hence I answer "I don't know".
or

2. I don't think much about future....and just want to focus on the excellency of what I currently do....assuming my present excellence will automatically pave path for future excellence....and thus ...I answer "I don't know".....

I don't want myself to set an impracticably high ambition....like becoming CEO/CTO of a global multinational or a world known business tycoon...as to me they seem more like distant dream.....ambition is something that you should be able to realize within your capacity and your abilities....the very crucial thing that you should bear in mind is "what is your capacity", "what are your abilities?" and "when you think you will spill beyond your limits (break point) and give up?".....self realization....people call it.....and self realization doesn't happen over night......it takes years of experience to determine what you are really good at......when you realize what you are really good at that's when you set an ambition.....and work for it.......So, at this juncture....the only ambition I have is to excel and succeed in whatever I do....I try for excellence, quality and responsiveness in my work.......I try to groom these qualities so that they become a second nature.....I haven't really understood yet what I am really good at.....and thus I don't see it justified saying something garbage for e.g. I want to be CEO, Entrepreneur, PM, CM, or whatever heck.....just to answer these big questions.....

In summation....unless I get a genuine, practical answer of this question from myself......I would keep saying...."I don't know".....because....I don't know!!!

Hope that answers....

life updates

My recent mystic exile from the blogging world was quite on purpose....I didn't go to South Africa to cheer for a particular DLF IPL team (I am not a good sports material anyway)...neither did I venture into the campaigning of country's massive general elections ( I wish I could understand politics).....for last 5-6 months....I spent most of the time in office (and in all honesty.....didn't make much headway there either :-).....when you don't do things as you had planned....nonsensical reasons become handy.......I don't want to state reasons such as "lack of time", "extremely busy" which would boast my state of absolute immersion in the routine work..(as if, It's only me in this world...who works in office)....but the long isolation from my much loved pastime (authorship) in these 6-7 months, has left my mind nothing less than a junkyard....housing innumerous thoughts waiting to be dumped somewhere.....even then I don't understand why....for the first time I did not feel the need of a paper to play the role of a regular dumb listener of my chatter.....(reminds me of Mr. Wilson from Cast Away...)......In this half year.....life underwent various controlled and uncontrolled shifts....ranging from things as trivial as cleaning my undergarments/socks on regular basis to as important as reading Ram-Charit-Manas daily....(oh by the way...I am nearly half done now....my largest stride in book reading )......

Things are fine in life....I start from home in the morning...I fight traffic.....I reach office.....I try to work.....I try to be productive..... end of the day, when I fail to get anything working....I abuse my work, my day......then I fight the traffic again and come back to home.....end of the month...I thank my employer and draw my salary....and end of the year...I abuse govt and pay my taxes....the only interesting part in these sequence of events is that...I have gotten a chance to work with some talented people after a long time.......I have realized that I am not really a technical guru (may be not I, but other people had that opinion about me)......after seeing a bunch of other talents around me.....I realized that before proclaiming your self a behemoth, you first need to look around and see the class of people you are competing with....the complexity of work you have.....and in what magnitude you have put efforts........as my colleague Shantanu says....almost everything is relative.....and so is success....when you compete with weaker sections......chances are you may effortlessly win....but what are the odds of victory when everyone else around is as talented as you (or may be even more...)?....I don't mind downplaying myself openly....I won't lie to my blog (unless there is a humor involved) and would say upfront what I am not good at.....face it......facts remain facts.....and they stand.....no matter you admit them or not....

There was a time in my career when I wanted to do great things.....things which are great in ideas.....things great in capacity........things great in dimension, comprehension, attention, attraction...things great in all possible facets......and now I sit at the corner of my cube and compile softwares, realizing that may be I belonged to the that section of the people who strongly need advice and counseling to help them understand the reality........not that I don't enjoy what I am doing currently.......but, to say, technology is boundless....you may never know when you start from one extreme and traverse through the chained link of components and emerge out to the other extreme....and thus may come across serendipity :)

On other note..... have been quite insulated from most of my friends/acquaintances/relatives.....I hardly get a chance to talk to them (thanks to the office work that comes up on Saturdays and Sundays)......you won't believe....I am spend nothing more than 500Rs every month on my postpaid connection (out of which 250 is mandatory rental).....and no...I don't use my landline at all.....I understand that, for a sleek, trendy, 2nd generation, Silver colored, Apple Iphone handset......this sounds like a sheer disgrace....but then, I am glad that I am atlest saving money somewhere ( there was a time when I used to pay 1500 per month)........and I hate to admit that I have become so unsocial....but again....face it.....facts remain facts.....and they stand.....no matter you admit them or not....

Left Brain vs Right Brain

This is interesting....I saw it clockwise all the time.....suddenly a Gtalk chat window popped up....and after a short chat session...when I saw it back....it was counter-clockwise!!!....I tried focusing to and away from image multiple times....and concluded...when I take my focus away from the image and see it back.....I could see counter-clockwise....but not otherwise!!!!

It is, however, difficult to vouch the veracity of the analysis stated below but yes, different people perceive this image differently. Just by little exercise, I could see her moving in either direction....

If clockwise than you use right brain more….vice-versa otherwise……..

LEFT BRAIN FUNCTIONS
uses logic
detail oriented
facts rule
words and language
present and past
math and science
can comprehend
knowing
acknowledges
order/pattern perception
knows object name
reality based
forms strategies
practical
safe

RIGHT BRAIN FUNCTIONS
uses feeling
"big picture" oriented
imagination rules
symbols and images
present and future
philosophy & religion
can "get it" (i.e. meaning)
believes
appreciates
spatial perception
knows object function
fantasy based
presents possibilities
impetuous
risk taking!

Source: Sameer's Blog.

Main article: here

No end in sight...

Not to beat the dead horse on the already overblown aftermath of 26/11 attacks....this text is to merely reiterate what I had always said in my previous posts.......what we need to understand is whether our religion(s) is really doing justice to us......think for a while.....if none of the religion teaches killing of innocents and we all believe in God and peace......then why doesn't God show up to save innocents?........I wonder what good is my religion if I can't leave in peace.....well to me....all of the religion seem senseless......since neither of the allah, jesus or ram has done anything to save innocents.....Trust me....everything will fix itself if we take the religion out of the country.......may be we don't need it.....all we need is peace....all we need is to let not hatred pervade within us.....not "religion"....

I read this nice quotation somewhere:

"When the power of love will overcome the love of power.....This world will know peace....."

Let us not over-react and blame any religion....Let the love prevail above everything.....

Music is enough for lifetime....

.........but lifetime is not enough for music.......

I love music just as much as any average ordinary human being loves it......needless to say, just as others, I am too confined to a genre/class/section that defines my taste.......for me, music mostly means melody......a definition from wikipedia.....(pay attention to the bold marks):

"Melodic music is a term that covers various genres of non-classical music which are primarily characterised by the dominance of a single strong melody line. Rhythm, tempo and beat are subordinate to the melody line or tune, which is generally easily memorable, and followed without great difficulty."

I have known people who have varying taste in music......and they often switch the genre according to what suits more to their mood.......I don't really have contrasting taste for different occasions.......for me, good music is an amalgamation of sweet tunes, noiseless beats and understandable lyrics.....for the very reason of subtle lyrics, I am not a big fan of Ghazals......with all due respect and with no offense meant, I really don't have patience to wait for Jagjit to finish singing his lines and then join those lines together (provided, I remember from where he started....) to interpret and understand what he had sung and then ultimately relish the deeeeeeep seated idea of the composition......nah!...not my cup of tea........I am ok with western music too, but only as long as their lyrics make sense, they have mild harmonious tempo, they are not squeaky.....and have an acceptable degree of "groaning and moaning"....rest is all noise....I must say....

It is really difficult to list my fav bollywood singers because I like all of them except Adnan Sami and Anu Malik.....(well, not really a singer)....in contemporaries....I like Shan, Lucky Ali, Abhijeet.....In legends....it is undisputed Rafi (and sometimes Shailendra).....there are some other talents sprouting in bollywood (KK, Kunal, Kailash kher etc) who have sung good songs.....but have long way to make a never lasting impact....

To be honest....I am not at all music aware....neither have notions of being one....except names of a few musical instruments....I don't know anything beyond in the music.....in musicians' parlance, I am but a "kala kauaan" who doesn't really know what music is....my mother always wanted her children to be nice in singing and dancing....she wanted us to join music classes.....now when I listen comments from my friends on my singing....I realize that would have been a sheer wastage of money.....people who have the talent of music and singing impress me a lot....and I believe it's a noble innate quality which not everyone is blessed with.....

My experiments with Interviews - part 2

"..Aah....yes...why not?..."...we all said in agreement......and then he gave a brief rundown of job description and there was a guy who pitched in a few typical questions apparently vomiting out everything he knew on the subject.....may be he thought he would just try to outrun others.....and to tell you......it was uncalled-for........I don't usually ask questions unless I really have one.....I have always observed that in such situations people tend to fabricate strange and wired doubts in their mind just to speak out something, so that they won't be regarded as dumb....and in that pursuit they dismiss all doubts that they really are one.....so coming back to the subject......finally, the big guy said that we are going to be having few rounds of personal interviews......by the time he was done speaking, 3-4 staff people showed up in the same room.....and one after other we were taken to separate rooms for interviews.......I somehow got fixed up with a lady who seemed to be unversed (may be their way to screen candidate through the least experienced, to ensure standards are met to the bare minimum, atleast).......through the aisle of cubes, she walked me to a interview room which was almost like at the other end of the office.....Since she was lady (ladies....excuse me)....chances were remote that something substantial could have come out of that discussion......and as I had expected she started with some vague questions which at first were ok.....as time passed, she kept me asking more strange, obscure and incomprehensibly open ended questions like:

(RIM - Response In Mind)

Q. What would you do if a machine is down?
RIM: [Hhhmm......how about influencing the machine with a large hammer??.....]

Q.How much time you will take to fill a floppy disk?
RIM: [.....wait a darn minute here!!!......fill with what? data? virus?....@#$!^%@*&%.... ]

Q. What would you do if your page doesn't load in browser?
RIM: [...I'll rip the page and throw in the garbage.....that would help?....]

etcetra......


etcetra.....

For most of the times, I kept on asking my questions after her questions, just to make the sense out of her questions....and sometimes I just assumed what could she possibly be asking......not that I tried to ridicule her while answering, neither did I try to imply that her questions were senseless but surely her questions were worth a sarcasm while (I did not let my sarcasm vent out....though....)........having done and satiated.......she left the room, asking me to wait.....I doubted if she was really convinced......but actually it didn't matter to me much, because I now had time to catch my breathe after she extorted absolutely irrelevant explanations out of me for nearly 40 minutes, which I must say were my worst 40 minutes of time that I had ever spent in interviews........all I wanted was to exit the area as early as possible......

As I sat fixated to my chair in that room waiting for someone to enter and announce my dismissal so that I could get rid of more such stupid questions.......I observed people working outside in cubicals......one of them seemed downright indifferent to his work as he looked to the computer screen with dreary face.....in all boredom, that uninterested fella had his jaw rested on his palm so badly that I bet his elbow could nearly have made an excavation on the desk, had he continued to sit in that posture for another hour....."weekend work.......I can understand"......I spoke to myself and turned my eyes the other side where I saw a few cool dudes with strange hairstyles and unshaved?/halfshaved?/french-style? (take your pic.....) beards wearing T-shirts, 3/4th walked into the other cube and stopped by the desk of a guy who was busy watching some movie on his laptop.....usual regular boyish hoots and laughter broke out as they started bothering the "movie guy" for some reasons.....on the other side there were few ladies clustered around a desk seemed busy discussing their domestic chores, at times they all tried to speak together which made their speech extremely unclear and it seemed they hardly cared if anyone among them was listening.....it was like everyone trying to convince everyone else.....

while I was still surveying the ambience outside the room a sound drew my attention......"knock...knock...".......I was startled as I turned around and found the same big guy (pizza muncher!) standing by the door......he came in and said....."Hi......I am here to take your next round........".........bbuummeerrrr!!!....I was slight skeptical about this......as I did not know whether the last one was pass or fail....and for first time, I yearned for a "fail".....I had had enough and I wanted to leave.......I thought, why did I come to this stupid interview anyway....."ok.....whatever you say...".......I submitted for the next round......while that guy was not at all stupid with his question, I still did not seem to figure out as to what kept my interest away from answering the questions that day......he uprooted my concepts......digged into gory details....drilled down to fundamentals then back upright to implementations....busted my explanations a few times........but still I tried all I could to make difference......some initial dialogue between us happened something like this....

He: What is your daily work?
Me: I automate FTP/SFTP stufff through scripts.

He: Is that all you do?
Me: Yes. There is nothing more to it.

He: So, what's the challenge?
Me: I never said there is a challenge. If there was, I wouldn't be here in the first place.

He: I liked your answer.
Me: Glad, you did.

for every question he asked.....I would start down from basic assuming as if he was a fool....explaining things the best I can........with occasionally spewing technical jargons and verbal ornamentation to an acceptable degree of composition.....

For the rest of the day........I sat there.....facing rounds after rounds.....letting people tear and shred my concepts.....so happened with my brain too........by evening I was insensate, numb and nearly paralyzed to comprehend things......I believe if anyone would have asked me any further questions......they would be nearly talking to a corpse......when I was told that I was done for the day......I did even have advertency to feel good.......and so I gathered my conscience and found the way out.......somehow I drove back to home and leapt outright to the bed......but one thing that I really appreciate about interviews is that I have always had very positive and radical transformations to my concepts, ideas and way I interact in discussions......and this one had really helped me testify my energy level.....God or Bad........end of the day......everything turns into experience and what matters is......how well you can sustain a situation akin to that in future.......

Until next time.......

My experiments with Interviews - part 1

On a neat fine day.....while I was attending my daily work with my head completely inclosed in the computer screen at the office.....I got a phone call from my brother.....

me: "hello..."
Brother: "can you forward me your resume, apparently there is something I have that might interest you....."
Me: "Ok....it will be on your way in a moment"
Brother: "Ok...see you at home..."

cut!

It was understood to me that one of my brother's friend had been asking him to refer him someone who has understanding of UNIX and other support related technologies.....while I wasn't quite excited about the change, I decided to give it a try.....

few days later I was called by the company for the interview......now Interviews are something that, I believe, I have been doing since a very long time.....of which most have been offhanded and extemporary endeavor with majorly positive results......but this time I wanted to be a little off the hook....so I overturned a few pages from the books just to revive my understandings of things I thought I knew well.......

On the interview day, when I finally reached the front office, the recruiter escorted me to a room which already had nearly 15-20 people......"please wait here, you will have a written test....".....she said with a mild smile....."that's fine"...I replied.....but deep within my gut screamed......."Arrrggghhhh......written test?????........what the heck!!!!".........huh.......I knew those written tests are a mixed bag of questions related to technology, aptitude, psychometric and so on.......I was definitely not ready to subject myself under the condition where I will need to exercise my brain mercilessly to solve some extremely intricate aptitudinal tricks.....whether it is to simplify a brother-sister-uncle-aunt relationship......or to figure out the next one in a series of awkward looking, seemingly unrelated (but mathematically related) numbers....or whether it is something to do with an extremely obscure and rhetoric reasoning puzzles which boggles you head off first and then turns your brain insentient.......or something needing you to understand and amend a convoluted programming code which has askew and interwoven pointer references where first one leads to the second and the second leads to the third and by the time you make out the third leads you where, you would already forget where the first one had lead you.......

Nevertheless.....to make my early rise up and fuel expenses worth for that day......I decided to submit to the test......others present in the room looked more intellect and talented.....I knew I stood no where in the competition......sitting on the chair I took my cellphone out of my pocket and started playing with the keypad........few moments later.....the recruiter came back with test papers.......I did not even have pen to mark answers in the sheet......and hence I asked recruiter to get one for me......although I knew I wouldn't be using even a pinch of the ink in it.....

Quite as expected, as soon as I saw the first question, the first thing I uttered "dang!!!"......I did not understand it......so I moved to the next question.....and there it was.....another "dang!!!!"........I skipped to the third one "dang!!!!"..........then fourth......."dang!!!"....then...."dang!!!"........"dang!!!"........"dang!!!"........."dang!!!"...........I kept turning pages until I reached the last blank page a.k.a. rough work.......only to find out that out of 30 questions, I knew answer of just 2......I started outright with the ones I knew I would be able to do....in the interim I also occasionally turned my neck around to sneak what reaction others had had on their face......basically I wanted to understand how intellect the people were and how far this test was going to damage my image when I will be declared disqualified in front of every one (yes, I knew firsthand that that was going to happen)......well, to me, they all seemed busy solving their papers and I was the only odd man out......by the end of the test, I could answer as many as 7 questions.....not sure if they were correct but they were to the best of my knowledge........for objective questions, I had also mentioned my rationale behind the option I had marked correct.....I attempted the last programming question....and left it half done.......

Answer sheets were collected and we were asked to wait for an hour or so for the results.......heck! what result.....I knew my result beforehand......even before I was handed the question paper......I wanted to prowl out of the hall and escape from the announcement of my disgraceful defeat in front of everyone.....but then, I am very bad at acting......I had to show everyone that I was going out casually.....a few times I tried too......by keeping my cellphone on the ear projecting that I am on phone and going out for better coverage.......but......ugh!!!....... the whole entire recruitment staff was present outside the hall.....they would not let me go out until results were out, whatsoever.....

I spent rest of the time convincing myself that this is going to be ok......nobody knows you.....and nobody among here is going to find you out on the streets or cinema or shopping malls and scream......."hey....that guy....he couldn't pass the simple written test....".....no one would even remember your face........keep cool and stand by......

After about an hour passed.......the staff came in with results.........."it's time.....".......I said to my self.......one of the lady in the staff said......" I will call out few names.......those people please follow me........".......just after three names.........she said....."and.......".............I wondered.......how could "and" come so soon.......that means only 4 guys could make it??......wwooohhhooo!!!!.......I wasn't alone disqualified........she called out the last name..........."and......Opesh Alkara.......four of you please follow me......"


Dumbfounded I, stood up and looked around to the faces of everyone, they all were looking at me......even I too did not understand what was going on.......because I did not expect my name to be there on the list......then I thought.....possibly only 4 of us failed to qualify (3 of the others too looked like fools).....and since that was a reputed company with profound HR policies.....they might not be announcing that in front of everyone.....may be...they were going to take us to an isolated room where we would be asked to leave silently so that our unwanted humiliation could be avoided......the four of us followed the lady........through the mazes of cubicles.....we were taken to a training room.......where a man with tall and hefty build was waiting for us......the table had boxes of pizzas, burgers, fountain coke, bread sticks etc.....the man said....."Hope you might be a little hungry.......why don't we have lunch and talk.........".....I couldn't understand the math behind all that........why the losers were offered lunch.....that too with an attendant to talk about things.........I thought...might be this is a big company.....might be its their HR policy to let every candidate have lunch and go.......might be......

I restrained from taking pizzas as I don't like it......I don't take colas either.......so I just had 1-2 bread sticks......I was waiting for the man to signal us to leave as soon as his lunch was done......but that man seemed to be in no hurry.....he had been munching pizza slices one after other like a starving gorilla masticating bamboo shoots.....he then took leap on a burger and finished it within no time as I sat there eyeballing him devouring every item available in packets......plus I noticed, the other 3 candidates were busy in their eating business too.......and when our eyes met........we exchanged a funny grin which had concealed message......"though what we have lost......we have got atleast something to eat......"....after the tall man was done with his lunch.......he spoke....."So how was the test???"......"yeah....good....good....".....everyone cooed......

"Congrats.......you guys have made it through written test!!!"

A shock of 220 volts ran past my body organs.......how could it be?? I did not even answer 10 questions correctly.......I wasn't yet out of that instantaneous stroke.....while he spoke further......"I hope you know what the job description is like??......should I explain??"

continued in part 2...........

Noida trip - part 2

Driving heedlessly, we almost traversed back to delhi and reached in the locality where our friends stay.....I asked Namit to stop right to the shop where I had purchased toothpaste....because that was the latest I remembered I had been carrying a bag......but then since it had rained......we saw nothing but water logged lanes, mud and grease everywhere.....since it was 10 short of 11 PM the shop was still open and I went to shopowner to enquire if he had, by chance, witnessed me dropping or leaving a bag in shop or nearby area......the answer was, as you guessed, "NO".....Namit's concrete hopes were challenged by the unfortunate truth that we had lost the bag......and that there was no way we were going to find it on the way back to noida too.....but then while I was looking out for bag near the shop, Namit on the other side of the road screamed....."mil gayaaaa......."......he picked up a mud drenched bag from under the silencer of a parked Maruti Omni.....yes, it did look like the bag I was carrying except that it was, dirty, filthy and all soaked in mud.....I said...."abe....tere papers?...kya hua hoga unka....?".........namit smirked......and said..."papers, water proof envelope me hain....".....yeah!!!......there we go.....we got what we wanted and all at the penalty of just 40 Kms drive.....Namit's forehead's wrinkles and face expressions, which had gone distorted, out of disgust, in the coarse of time, regained the normal posture as soon as he made sure that papers indeed weren't crumbled in mud water........now after we found the bag, the first thing that popped to our senses was "dinner"..............we drove back to noida and this time double excited......that was another good and justified reason to enjoy my 2nd round on expressway......that too amidst, thunder, storm and rain.......Namit was relieved and looked downright upbeat albeit a drive of almost 60 kms.......

not that we opened a bottle of champagne or something to celebrate.....but don't deny that, the occassion surely called for it.....Good lesson learnt.....never-ever carry any documents in original with you.....and if you do.....make sure they are babied and are in right hands........

so....I got little late for next day training class and all I wanted was a good sleep.......we drove to the guest house where Namit dropped me and went back to his flat.......

the next morning......I was scheduled to report to training at around 10 AM.....and I reached there by 10:15 only to find out that most of the things needed for training were missing from the hall......in all fury I called HR who was supposedly responsible for making due arragements......and said her that that wasn't I expected........later on she herself walked to the training hall while I was busy minding the training machines......when she reached at the room, the class called to my attention that she was there......no sooner I turned around, our eyes met......we had talked over phone but hadn't seen each other (basically....you don't wish to....unless person on other side has really exceptional voice...)....she really had beautiful, piercing, twinkling pair of eyes....her appearance, simple yet sublime, was worth my attention while.....I could hear the music of violin buzzing around in the air....all my rage vaporized instantly......the mystique glint in her eyes, as if struck some kind of magic spell on me, which then, bursted out communication between my brain and other organs making me particularly numb for a fraction of second....but then I gathered my senses and instantly flickered my eyes to quickly rebound from that infinitesimal stupefaction.....I definitely had to do it to avoid an awkward incident...I told her about the situation at training room, which she said she will address and shortly was on her way back....while on conversation I did not look in her eyes directly for more than a sec....

aahemmm!!.....never mind.....so we were talking about training......and as you know I have now turned pretty much perfect into it........I pitched in my regular standard stuff, cooed my introduction and teaching patterns etc....

the training lasted for a week.....and I was hopefully able to meet the audience's objective....I returned back to hyderabad that weekend.....but the sad thing was......I did not get see the HR again after that day.........

may be, yes......may be because, people say "sweet things come in small packages......like candies"

:)

until next time........

Noida trip - part 1

My recent business trip to Noida was more sort of eye-opener rather than just a travel.....I got to figure out that there is altogether a different world out there in India which is neat and organized, where people don't have to pass their vehicles amidst abrupt and arbitrary construction sites, where the public places aren't suffocatingly congested, where we have roads that span for miles untwisted and the intercepts are accurately orthogonal.......where everything is sparse and have enough flare of its own to accommodate things.....where not every lane smells like a public toilet forcing people to hold their breathe or die inhaling the toxins....all in all.....Noida was utterly a different sort of city I had come across in India.....and trust me it was enthralling being a part of it for a week.....

The trip was a part of technical training that I was supposed to deliver......no sooner I landed the Delhi airport....bunch of taxi walas circumvented me in an attempt to offer their transport service....I was almost pushed to a corner by their overwhelming willingness to offer business....some of them nearly snatched my luggage as if they were my relatives or something who had come to receive me....no sooner I told them that I have already got a cab booked from office and it would be just a matter of a short call before it comes and escorts me to my destination, they all instantly turned around showing downright indifference and got dispersed in crowed......after going through all the sign boards held by cab drivers at the arrival section.....I couldn't find my name.....now I knew I had to make a deal with one of those cab drivers......I approached to one......he offered: "bhaiyya....Noida sec 34 ka keval 1300 Rs".......

"hahahaha...."..I thought...."kevel and 1300Rs in the same breath.......???"....after enough discussion and argument...... I later fixed a cab for Rs 1200....which i know is sufficiently more than the reasonable fare.....(I don't know why I am so disinclined at bargaining things).....nonetheless...that was an official trip...and I knew I would get reimbursements......

after reaching guest house....I called Namit who happens to be one of my closest college friends......we drove around city roads.....visited a few places.....watched girls eyefull...... and then decided to drive to dehli to meet few more friends....Namit handed me a bag which contained his vehicle's papers....may be I was thinking something else and did not hear him saying that it contained bike's registration papers.......most of the time while holding the bag I assumed that it had nothing except an envelope.....while returning back from friend's flat in delhi......I stopped to purchase tooth paste and other items at a small shop.....I shoved the items in my pockets and then we drove straight to the famous atta market for dinner.....weather had been little cloudy.....thunders and bolts threatened of rain......the drive on the expressway that joins delhi and noida was smashing....exept that you pay toll to use it...huh!.....it had started raining and time was almost 10 PM while we stopped at atta for dinner.....I noticed that the bag was not with me...hesitant, I asked Namit......

Opesh: Abe.....tera bag.....usme kya-kya tha??
Namit: (unbeknownst of bag loss, while parking bike....) bataya naa....gadi ke papers the.....
Opesh: (faints...and stammers).....abe.....wo....mm....mujhe lagta hai.....wo...kahin gir gaya....
Namit: (eyeballs out....jaw dropped...) bhai...bol de mazak kar raha hai??
Opesh: (stammers further...) abe....mm.....mazak nahi.....sach mein......kahin kho gaya.......
Namit: (puts his both hands over his forehead, in disgust...) batti lag gayi........

what could be worse than this....namit was dumbstruck.....I knew dinner was a forgotten concept now.....the "bag" became everything for Namit for that while......we moved outright back to delhi.......traversing the same path that lead us to noida......in slightest hope that we could find his bag and papers somewhere on the way......but to me, glimmer of hope wasn't even remotely evident.....somehow Namit had hope that we would be able to find it.....never saw him that serious......we covered 20 more kms and this time in utter slience.....neither of us did not speak a word.....nature turned cruel......thunders....bolts....storming winds......heavy torrents of rain drops that hit against us as we crusaded back.....I constantly tried to recall where I could have dropped the bag......but then...again it seemed to be weak and fruitless attempt......

continued in part 2..........

Sunday Buffet......

During my graduation days, the most predominant trouble we had had was with meals on Sundays......our "kaam wali" was a little classy and posh....so she had refused to cook on Sundays. Eventually we strayed on city roads seeking for cheap, hygienic food stations......there wasn't any alternative to get around this frustrating compulsion until just after a little brain storming we devised an indecent but quite elegant way to remediate the looming trouble.....we decided to find and attack the best buffet party going on in nearby locality......usually the ones with more crowd and less security.....you might think, it was not a good idea and I too have guilt-conscious revealing this to you.....but, trust me....we did it in sheer obligation......and I believe, nothing accounts for a bad trait in student life, you have rights to claim student excuse everywhere



An interesting incident related to our "free buffet" happened once in a party at the nearby ground...the glimmering entrance of party-area was accompanied by some hosts who welcomed every guest walking in ...we strutted in wearing a plastic smile to gently acknowledge the hosts......no sooner we were in, at least 15-20 flavors of different dishes competing for air space smacked on our face..sweet, sour, tangy, chilli, pungent, masala and more descriptive adjectives than I care to list...the aromas invaded all our capillaries from head to feet which added to appetence....you know what? when you see nearly 40-50 saucers of delicious food in front of you......and given that you are starving daylong and that food is of free of cost......your get utmost sense of delight and gratification and you hardly care to notice anything going around.....above all.....our gang was nothing but a bunch of bankrupt, poverty-stricken, losers who looked at the party food just as the craving wild wolves look at the fresh chopped meat......someone looking at us would have easily made out that we had been deprived of food for long.....within no time we were on our business.....you could perceptibly notice the intimate pleasure we had had while gulping every morsel of the meal....we ingested nearly everything that obstructed the sight and didn't even burp after consuming items from every single saucer.....



Our gala feast wasn't yet over as we turned to desserts and fruit nectars..still unbeknownst to the material world, guys extracted scoops of ice-cream with trembling hands when a rather known face drew everyone's attention..suddenly a discomposure struck to everyone.....we noticed some of our college girls standing at the corner of shamiyana, observing our activities, speaking among themselves and laughing at us......movements froze, jaws dropped, eyes wide opened, I nearly coughed out the rasgullla I had gulped.......we were stunned when we found that it was party of one of our classmate girl.....and that at least 15-20 girls of our college were present around in that party....to make things worse.....all of those 20 girls in attendance had distinctly noticed how vigorously we had been devouring meals....I was dumbfounded and did not know how to react back to their expressions.



We finished meals and immediately exited the area.....for next 20-30 days we either disappeared from college or looked at our toes while walking in college.....in next coming days we did not even dare to look at any party side areas or decorations.....